Change.

The funny thing about life is: no matter what you plan, things always change. Dan and I have been talking about this year-long trek and climb through Asia for over a year now - and the only 'plan' we've made is the one-way ticket to Bengaluru we purchased about 7 weeks ago. We don't even have a reserved place to stay the first night we arrive! One small element of a 'plan.' And now, two weeks before we go, Dan is on crutches. Really, we couldn't have planned much less. But now that we're uncertain how he'll be walking and if he'll be able to carry a pack on March 3rd, even the one thing might change.

People think we're crazy for traveling like this. For living like this. But now that this one fluke, out-of-our-control thing happened - I have to say, there is a lot less to think and/or worry about if the 'plan' needs to change. Frankly, it's a relief!

The plunge.

I'm 30 and I just jumped in a lake. In upstate New York. In February. Air temperature was about 33 - water temperature was about 40. It was refreshing. I liked it so much the first time, I back-flipped in for a second dip. When I hit the water, I felt for a split second that I wanted to stay under. There was no sensation of cold - just the pure silence of stillness and the faint thump of my heart. Then, I felt ice crystals forming on my legs. My legs, quite literally, became slushy.

I'm not sure exactly where I'm going with this. I could take it to the 'rebirth' arena, but it wasn't quite that profound. It was fun! It made me feel jubilant and new. This time of year - when it's easy to feel sedentary and stale - it's important to jar your senses. It was an exercise in staying present. In the moment.

I feel like part of a swift-moving current. I'm about to take the second plunge of my 30th year. Two weeks from tonight, Dan and I will be on a plane headed for Bengaluru, India. I'm not sure how I feel about it at the moment. With so many other things that need to be done before we leave, it's hard to even consider being excited! I'm not sure if excited is the word. Maybe there isn't a word to describe how I feel. Ill-prepared? Completely prepared. Nervous? Calm. Uncertain? Surer of myself than ever before. We have no plans. We bought one-way tickets. We have some money in savings. What could go wrong? What is 'wrong'? Whatever happens happens. It is what is.

Now that's profound.

30.

It's almost here...the day I'm no longer in my 20s. I haven't thought much about it until today - the first day of the month I turn 30. But it's a little weird to think I'll be 'in my 30s' in only 6 days. These last few years of my 20s have been challenging, to say the least. But I guess life is always challenging. Growth only happens in the handling of challenges.

Like the bug that just crawled down my shirt. You know when you feel like something is tickling you a little - say, right above your shirt on your neck...so you scratch it - only to find that there is something in your hand. And suddenly, there is a 1 1/2 inch long bug on your lap - with big, beady eyes and sprawling legs. It's way too big to kill. I mean, it's not really nice to kill bugs anyway because they're harmless living things, too. But there is a threshold of size at which it's no longer comfortable to crush a bug. And this one was too big. So I scooped it up and started to carry it outside, when it jumped and I lost it again! The only thing worse than a big, ugly bug on you is a big, ugly bug that you know is in the room, but can't find. There's no telling what will happen with the elusive bug!! Worst case scenario: It makes its way to your bed and crawls in your mouth while your sleeping. Why is that the first thing that pops into your head every time you lose a bug in the house? It's totally disgusting!

Of course...in my new, 30s outlook on things - I better stop freaking out about the bug and realize that in about 5 weeks, there's a good chance I'll be eating an insect that big! It's all about perspective...