Random Thought of the Day

Does the president of the US carry - or even have - a business card??

To my fellow swimmers

To my fellow swimmers
There is a river flowing now
Very fast
That is so great and swift
That there are those who will be afraid

They will try to hold on to
The shore
And they will be torn apart
And suffer greatly

Know that the river has its
Destination

The elders say we must
Let go of the shore
Head out into the stream
And keep our heads above water

And I say who is there
With you to celebrate

At this time in history we
can take nothing personally
Least of all ourselves
For the moment that we do
Our spiritual growth and journey
Comes to a halt

The time of the lone wolf is over

So gather yourselves and vanish the word struggle
From your vocabulary

All that we do must be
Done in a sacred manner
And in celebration

We are the ones we have
Been waiting for

~ Native American Hopi Elder ~

Part of the Process

I'm about to return to Seattle for the first time since I left nine months ago and I'm not sure how I feel about it. There's this whole process we go through in order to leave a place - many of us have 'left' before and know this process well. We packed up bags and boxes...gave some stuff away and put other stuff in storage...maybe just got rid of everything but a backpack...quit a job...said goodbye to some friends and 'talk to you soon' to others...finished out a lease...made promises to keep in touch...felt uncertain and sad, excited and filled with anticipation. Sometimes we have a plan (what's that?!) and sometimes we just throw caution to the wind and trust that we'll come to rest where ever instinct, luck, opportunity or good fortune directs us. True, sometimes we rest only after a very challenging take-off, bumpy flight and crash landing - but there are usually moments - if only fleeting - that we think, 'okay, here I am.'

So here I am.

Here I sit in my new apartment in my new state with my new (used) car sitting in the driveway with my new state's license plates that I just drove home from a class regarding my newest passion and just got off the phone with one of my new friends that I am blessed to know in my new life. That's a whole lot of new-ness. And that's absolutely what I was looking for when I left Seattle. I crave uncertainty and anticipation. Of course, security and reflection aren't so bad when they swing around either - but uncertainty and excitement are definitely attributes that I continue to gravitate toward in my life.

It's interesting to consider that, with the exception (hopefully) of our home and family, everything is uncertain in our youth. Everything is encountered with curiosity and fascination and excitement. As adults, we often find humor in this constant discovery...but sometimes forget that there is always something for us to discover, too - no matter how redundant or routine life becomes in our quest for security.

As with most things in nature, this rhythm of new and old, beginning and end, anticipation and reflection is cyclic. We are constantly making choices that affect these patterns...but they are constantly in motion.

Along with this idea, I'm starting to develop an awareness that there is a process for returning to a place you once were. Those old things you stored or gave away...the old apartments...the old jobs...the old friends...all the old stuff is still there somewhere. And every time I am about to return to a place, I wonder if the old me might still be there, too. Am I returning to the old insecurities? Old relationships? Old patterns or habits? Will all this great new stuff I've learned about myself and about life simply disappear into the clouds as my plane makes its way North and West?

I don't think so. Not this time. I realize now that all of these little processes are part of a much bigger process. And this bigger process is ongoing and constantly evolving...so that we never feel secure anywhere but in our own skin...so that we carry home in our hearts rather than the structures we build to keep the rest of the world out...so that we may always find delight in the small things we never before noticed in the most familiar places.

But what happens when instinct, opportunity, choice or good fortune throw a little bit of uncertainty and anticipation into the circumstance of 'the return'? Hhhmmm...I'll let you know my thoughts on that in a few days!

Beauty

There are few events more magnificent

than bearing witness the luminous climb

A Hunter's moon

inclined to conquer

regal, snow crowned peaks

cradled by ink-stained twilight sky

laced with lingering sunset pink.

A thought.

I will admit, I geek out a little when it comes to people and cultures and how life is in other parts of the world...and I just received this offer from National Geographic for a book they are publishing, "Book of Peoples of the World" - containing excerpts, photos, etc. for preview. This one in particular stuck out to me - not in its literal sense, though it's an interesting concept in that way. Figuratively, it can be interpreted to represent any number of circumstances in our lives in which we create boundaries...stake the claim that something is 'mine' and not 'yours' - in an effort to protect ourselves, our families, our work (what we've earned), our hearts...

Think on it however suits you.


Those who have no fence around their land have no enemies.
~ Burundi proverb


(For those of you who are uncertain or would like a little bit more context, Burundi is a central African nation smaller in size than the state of Maryland, bordered by Rwanda, Tanzania, and the Republic of Congo. In the mid-90s, its first democratically elected president was assassinated after only 100 days in office, triggering widespread Hutu/Tutsi violence - similar to the conflict more widely known in Rwanda. Over 200,000 Burundians were killed over the course of almost a dozen years - imagine that as a percentage of population in a country smaller than Maryland! A relatively peaceful state and ceasefire has been "internationally brokered" in the past few years, but Central Africa still faces many challenges. How's that for perspective? Oh...and I just learned all this on the CIA World Factbook website...)

A goal.

I decided today that I need to live where I can listen to the water and smell the forest.

A quick trip up one of the canyons is nice 'n easy from this home of mine...but it's good for the soul to open the window and hear the constant lullaby of trickling water, scents of earth and pine filling the crisp air. I am never more present, more alive, more aware, than when I am there.

Lightening Up

Okay...so I decided that what I've written so far is a bit heavy - and it's true, I spend a good amount of time these days considering such esoteric stuff - but life isn't about just that.

So - I'm wondering if anyone else who has ever lived alone found (or finds) that they talk to themselves? I mean, I know a lot of people do - when they're getting dressed or looking in the mirror...I've seen people walking down the street in full conversations with - well, no one else was walking next to them...if maybe you're angry with someone and have words for them that it's probably better they didn't actually hear...lots of reasons, I guess.

But I just found myself sitting here...studying for class tonight...mind drifted off for a second...next thing I know, I've created this whole conversation - not with myself, in my daydream someone else was involved - but it's like I was talking to them with facial expressions and hand gestures and everything! In reality, I was flirting with the teapot on my stove.

Now, I've been told before by people that they talked more to themselves when they lived alone than at any other time in their lives...why is this a phenomenon? I've talked to plenty of people so far today...and am about to go teach a dance lesson and then have class tonight - it's not like I'm aching for conversation. Maybe I've got an over-active imagination? Maybe I just wanted to talk to this particular person and s/he is not around - or, it wouldn't be the conversation we'd have if we were to talk anyway? At least this way...the conversation always turns out how I'd like it to, right?

I mean, the teapot whistled back. ;-)